Today was easily the best day ever.
As many of you know I launched this campaign a couple of months ago with the aim of raising funds for my studies and year in Sweden. It was by far the BOLDEST and BRAVEST task I have ever taken on. I pushed internal boundaries that I have never pushed before and still get goosebumps when thinking back on the process leading up to the launching of the campaign , the duration of the campaign itself as well as the time following it. Sometimes it feels as though it is not my life and my deed (if that makes any sense – almost as though I am standing outside myself and watching myself do all these things).
However, following the end of the campaign, I have been hard at work giving birth to this page and this entire section on my blog whilst sending out emails to potential funders and organisations attempting to cover the remaining fee. At times I found myself drifting from the here and now. Feeling my body in the room but my mind, soul and heart pacing elsewhere, on the proverbial dark cloud looming above my head and shoulders.
With my time at YIP soon coming to an end, I was growing even more anxious and feeling like I was not deserving to be here. That voice of judgement can be rather loud you know… Stressing about saying goodbye to this phase of my life, this place and it’s people and attempting to reflect on what I have taken in on this portion of my journey while constantly aware of this debt.
Today is a happy day.
A day that reminds me that anything is achievable – despite the obstacles,
that it is true that whenever
I (or anyone) takes steps of complete confidence
in a certain direction, all else falls into place, the universe does it’s job of providing
every single thing needed to continue on.
I am filled with joy and gratitude for all my talents, gifts and all other inexplicable and unnameable elements that have guided me and assisted me in reaching this place. This point of taking a DEEP, SIGH, OF, RELIEF…
I can never be able to express this feeling I am experiencing towards the goodness, care and sheer kindness of people. Strangers and loved ones. I feel loved and deserving.
(If you’re not particularly into high fives then here’s an altenative cyber celebratory “handshake”)
I have received news that a foundation based in the Netherlands will cover the rest of my fees.
Yes. Yes. Yes.
Despite this gloomy, grey, rainy and rather cold day in the countryside of Sweden; the sun is shining as bright as ever within my soul.
Below; the video that started the ball rolling, whilst I sat on a friends bed in Copenhagen over Christmas break. Wow.